113 Funny Animal Jokes For Kids And Adults

Find here the collection of some funny, hilarious animal jokes for kids, adults, teens, and of all ages of children. These jokes are shared here to create humor. Because laughing creates a positive impact on you physically and mentally.

Cute Animal Jokes

1. A man walks into a zoo, the only animal was a dog. It was a shitzu

2. How do spiders communicate? Through the World Wide Web.

3. How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? “Pleased to eat you.”

4. There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left? None, because they were copycats!

5. What animal has more lives than a cat? Frogs, they croak every night!

6. What do you call 2 octopuses that look exactly the same? Itenticle.

7. What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up? A try and try and try-ceratops!

8. What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? Shear madness.

9. What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.

Also Find: Funny Jokes For 3 Year Old Kids

10. What do you give a dog with a fever? Mustard, its the best thing for a hot dog!

11. What is a cat’s favorite breakfast? Mice krispies

12. What pine has the longest needles? A porcupine.

13. What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? Ouch!

14. Where did the cat go when it lost its tail? To the retail store!

15. Where do mice park their boats? At the hickory dickory dock.

16. Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you left it.

17. Who makes dinosaur clothes? A dino-sewer.

18. Why are fish so good at watching their weight? Because they have lots of scales.

19. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose.

20. Why do the French eat snails? They don’t like fast food.

21. Why is a bee’s hair always sticky? Because it uses a honey comb!

Best Animal Jokes For Adults

22. How do you fit more pigs on your farm? Build a sty-scraper.

23. How do you keep a skunk from smelling? Plug its nose.

24. How does a dog stop a video? He presses the paws button.

25. What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball? Glass flippers.

26. What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk? An udder failure.

27. What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it? It gave a little wine.

28. What do fish take to stay healthy? Vitamin sea.

29. What do you call a cow in a tornado? A milkshake.

30. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bull-dozer.

31. What do you call an exploding monkey? A baboom.

32. What do you call lending money to a bison? A buff-a-loan.

33. What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil? Use a pen.

34. What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo? A woolen jumper!

35. What is black and white and red all over? A skunk with a rash.

36. What is the snake’s favorite subject? Hiss-story.

37. What was the first animal in space? The cow that jumped over the moon.

38. Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed.

39. Why do cows go to New York? To see the moosicals.

40. Why do fish live in saltwater? Because pepper makes them sneeze.

41. Why does a giraffe have such a long neck? Because his feet stink!

42. Why don’t bears wear shoes? What’s the use? They’d still have bear feet!

Animal Jokes For Kids

43. Which animal makes the best pet? A cat… because it is purr-fect.

44. What is black and white and red all over? A sunburnt zebra.

45. What goes tick tock, bow wow, tick tock, bow wow? A watch dog.

46. What time is it when a lion walks into a room? Time to leave.

47. Where do cows go on the weekend? To the moo-vies.

48. What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed? Time to get a new bed.

49. Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.

50. What do you call a dog with a fever? A hot dog.

51. What do you get when you cross a giraffe with a pig? Bacon and legs.

52. What do you get when you cross a crocodile with a rooster? A croc-a-doodle-doo.

53. What game do mice love to play? Hide and squeak.

54. What do you call an exploding monkey? A baboom!

55. Why do sharks swim in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze.

56. Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the udder side.

57. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer

Dinosaur Jokes For Kids

58. What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes? Doyouthinkysaraus

59. What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore!

60. How do you know if there is a dinosaur in your refrigerator? The door won’t shut!

61. What dinosaur would Harry Potter be? The Dinosorcerer

62. How can you best raise a baby dinosaur? With a crane!

63. What did the dinosaur put on her steak? Dinosauce

64. What do dinosaurs use on the floors of their kitchens? Rep-tiles

65. What is the best thing to do if you see a Tyrannosaurus Rex? Pray that it doesn’t see you.

66. What’s the nickname for someone who put their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex? Lefty

67. What game does the brontosaurus like to play with humans? Squash

68. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? To eat the chickens on the other side.

Bird Jokes For Kids

69. When does a teacher carry birdseed? When there is a parrot-teacher conference!

70. What is a polygon? A dead parrot!

71. What kind of bird works at a construction site? The crane!

72. Why does a flamingo lift up one leg? Because if it lifted both legs it would fall over!

73. What did the sick chicken say? Oh no! I have the people-pox!

74. What do you call a funny chicken? A comedi-hen

75. Why do scientists think humming birds hum? Because they can’t remember the words!

76. What bird is always depressed? The blue jay

77. Why do seagulls like to live by the sea? Because if they lived by the bay they would be bagels!

Cat Jokes For Kids

78. What kind of kitten works for the Red Cross? A first-aid Kit.

79. What’s worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing’ taxi cabs!

80. Why are cats good at video games? Because they have nine lives!

81. Why can’t a leopard hide? Because he’s always spotted!

82. What song does a cat like best? Three Blind Mice.

83. Where did the school kittens go for their field trip? To the mewseum

84. Why did the cat go to medical school? To become a first aid kit

85. Who was the first cat to fly in an airplane? Kitty-hawk

86. Have you ever seen a catfish? No. How did he hold the rod and reel?

87. What state has a lot of cats and dogs? Petsylvania

Elephant Jokes For Kids

88. What time is it when an elephant sits on the fence? Time to fix the fence!

89. Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow? So he wouldn’t fall into the hot chocolate.

90. What would you do if an elephant sat in front of you at a movie? Miss most of the film.

91. Why are elephants so wrinkled? Did you ever try to iron one?

92. What do you do when you see an elephant with a basketball? Get out of its way!

93. What is gray and blue and very big? An elephant holding it’s breath!

94. What time is it when ten elephants are chasing you? Ten after one!

95. What wears glass slippers and weighs over 4,000 pounds? Cinderellephant

96. What was the elephant’s favorite sport? Squash

97. How do you keep an elephant from charging? You take away its credit cards!

98. What’s the best thing to do if an elephant sneezes? Get out of its way!

Dog Jokes For Kids

99. What did one flea say to the other? Should we walk or take a dog?

100. What did the cowboy say when his dog ran away? Well, doggone!

101. What do dogs get after they graduate from obedience school? Their masters.

102. What do you call a dog that is left handed? A south paw!

103. What dog keeps the best time? A watch dog!

104. What dog loves to take bubble baths? A shampoodle!

105. What happens when it rains cats and dogs? You can step in a poodle!

106. What is a deadly creature that looks like a dog, eats dog food, lives in a doghouse, and consumes dog food? A dog with a machete.

107. What type of markets do dogs avoid? Flea markets!

108. What was the little Scottish dog’s reaction when he first saw the Loch Ness Monster? He was Terrier-fied.

109. When you cross an aggressive dog with a computer, what do you get? A lot of bites.

110. Which dog breed loves living in the Big Apple? A New Yorkie.

111. Why are dogs like phones? Because they have collar IDs.

112. Why did the poor dog chase his own tail? He was trying to make both ends meet!

113. Why don’t dogs make good dancers? Because they have two left feet!

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This post is published by MS who started the website Find Motivation. The goal of this website is to motivate people by giving them the right knowledge and information.