Find here the collection of some funny, hilarious best corny jokes for kids, adults, teens, and of all ages of children. These jokes are shared here to make you laugh to create a positive impact on you physically and mentally.
Best Corny Jokes
1. A book fell on my head. I can only blame my shelf.
2. A man was attacked by string instruments. It was a violin-t act!
3. Can February March? No, but April May!
4. Did you hear about the guy who cut off the left side of his body? He was all right.
5. Did you hear about two guys who stole a calendar? I heard they both got six months!
6. Did you know that alligators can grow up to 15 feet? Well, I didn’t they usually only have 4!
7. Do they allow loud laughing in Hawaii? Or is it just a low ha?
8. Have you heard about the corduroy pillow? It’s making headlines!
9. How did the barber win the race? He knew a shortcut!
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10. How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool.
11. How did the rabbit feel after winning the lottery? Super hoppy!
12. How did the two cats end their fight? They hissed and made up.
13. How do rabbits travel? By hareplanes.
14. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it
15. How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card.
16. How do you tell if a vampire is sick? See if he is coffin.
17. How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!
18. I got thrown out of a park because I was rearranging squirrels by height. They didn’t like my critter sizing!
19. I have a fear of speed bumps. I’m slowly getting over them.
20. I lost an electron. You really have to keep an ion them!
21. I started telling everyone about the benefits of eating fried grapes. I’m raisin awareness.
22. If a cop pulls over a Uhaul, did he bust a move?
23. If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do elves get? Mistle-toes.
24. My horse’s name is mayo. Because mayo neighs!
25. What did 50 Cent do when he was hungry? 58!
26. What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine? Give me my quarterback!
27. What did the nut say to the other nut in a game of tag? Imma cashew!
28. What did the policeman say to his belly? You’re under a vest.
Corny Jokes For Adults
29. What did the shark say when he ate a clownfish? This tastes a little funny.
30. What did the tomato say to the other tomato during a race? Ketchup.
31. What did the yoga instructor say when her landlord tried to evict her? Namaste.
32. What do cows most like to read? Cattle-logs.
33. What do elf’s learn in school? The elf-abet.
34. What do French fries do after a long time? They ketchup!
35. What do lawyers wear to work? Lawsuits.
36. What do runners eat before a race? Nothing they fast!
37. What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships.
38. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
39. What do you call a belt with a clock on it? A waist of time!
40. What do you call a chicken that is staring at a lettuce? Chicken sees a salad.
41. What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
42. What do you call a factory that sells good products? A satis-factory.
43. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fssh.
44. What do you call a man that irons clothes? Iron Man.
45. What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer? Father-in-law!
46. What do you call a row of rabbits hopping away? A receding hare line.
47. What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore.
48. What do you call a snobby criminal going down the stairs? A con descending.
49. What do you call an American bee? USB!
50. What do you call an angry carrot? A steamed veggie!
51. What do you call fake spaghetti? An im-pasta.
52. What do you call when a cow jumps on a trampoline? A milkshake!
Funny Corny Jokes For All
53. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.
54. What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose? Ham boogers!
55. What flower do you have between your nose and chin? Two lips!
56. What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.
57. What has more lives than a cat? A frog, because it croaks every day.
58. What kind of music do planets like? Neptunes.
59. What kind of shoes do robbers wear? Sneakers.
60. What kind of tea is hard to swallow? Reality.
61. What rock group has four men that don’t sing? Mount Rushmore!
62. What tree can you fit in your hand? A palm tree!
63. What was the frog’s job at the hotel? Bellhop.
64. What wears a cap but doesn’t have a head? A water bottle!
65. What’s black and white and read all over? A newspaper!
66. What’s brown and sticky? A stick!
67. What’s that restaurant on the moon like? It doesn’t have atmosphere.
68. What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.
69. What’s the world’s tallest building? A library because it has the most stories!
70. When do computers overheat? When they need to vent.
71. When is a door not a door? When it’s ajar.
72. Where can you buy soup in bulk? The stock market.
73. Where did Captain Hook but his hook? The second-hand store.
74. Where did the cat go after losing its tail? To the retail store!
75. Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed!
Smart Corny Jokes To Make You Laugh
76. Why are the Irish so wealthy? Because their capital is Dublin.
77. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? She will let it go!
78. Why can’t your ear be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
79. Why couldn’t the sailor do his alphabet? He got lost at the C!
80. Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack!
81. Why did Mickey Mouse go to space? He wanted to find Pluto!
82. Why did the ball leave the party early? He was on a roll!
83. Why did the cucumber call 911? He was in a pickle!
84. Why did the farmer win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
85. Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn’t see himself doing it.
86. Why did the kid stock up on yeast? He wanted to make some dough.
87. Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.
88. Why did the photo go to jail? Because it was framed.
89. Why did the restaurant hire a pig? He was good at bacon.
90. Why did the robber jump in the shower? He wanted to make a clean getaway.
91. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
92. Why did the strawberry cry? His parents were in a jam.
93. Why did the student eat his homework? He was told it’d be a piece of cake
94. Why did the tomato blush? He saw the salad dressing.
95. Why didn’t the skeleton get a prom date? He didn’t have the guts to ask anyone.
96. Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs.
97. Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work!
98. Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators? It lifts their spirits!
99. Why do the seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels.
100. Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? If it had four doors it would be called a chicken sedan.
101. Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella? For drizzle!
102. Why does Waldo only wear striped shirts? Because he doesn’t want to be spotted!
103. Why don’t ants get sick? Because they have anty bodies!
104. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They crack up too easily.
105. Why don’t you buy things with Velcro? It’s a rip-off.
106. Why is grass so dangerous? It’s full of blades.
107. Why should you never fight a dinosaur? You’ll get jurasskicked!