Find here the collection of some funny, hilarious biology jokes for kids, adults, teens, and of all ages of children. These jokes are shared here to make you laugh. Because laughing creates a positive impact on you physically and mentally.
Best Biology Jokes For Students
1. A couple of biologists had twins… They named one Jessica and the other Control.
2. A dermatologist was studying new remedies for itching, but his lab burnt down… Now he has to start from scratch.
3. A fellow accidentally ingested some alpha-L-glucose and discovered that he had no ill effect. Apparently he was ambidextrose.
4. A marine biologist finally found their porpoise in life.
5. Are you made of Copper and Tellurium? Because you are Cu-Te.
6. Baby, I wish I were DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes.
7. Biologists can also be great philosophers. They give fantastic life lessons.
8. Biology is the only science where multiplication is the same thing as division.
9. Biology professor: “Hello, class. Today we will be learning about the liver and the pancreas.” Biology student: “Ugh, I hate organ recitals.”
10. Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled to 30 different countries and learned to speak six languages? He was a man of many cultures.
11. Did you just mutate for a stop codon? Because you’re talking nonsense!
12. Girl, you’re so hot you denature my proteins.
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13. Good news! There are well over 100 labs in America working on developing a vaccine. Just wait till they get the German shepherds involved!
14. How can you tell the age of a tree? I wouldn’t ask…that would be rude.
15. How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? As an itsy bitsy book.
16. How do you know if 2 cells are separating? One of them just called the divorce lawyer.
17. How does a marine biologist end a conversation? Sea you later!
18. How does Juliet maintain a constant body temperature? Romeostasis.
19. How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to change it, and three to write the environmental-impact statement.
20. How much seating do fungi need on the bus? As mushroom as possible.
21. I made a DNA joke in my biology class but no one laughed… Guess my thymine was off.
22. I was reading a book on helium… I couldn’t put it down.
23. I wish I was adenine… Then I could get paired with U.
24. If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.
25. Moss and Ivy make excellent friends; they really grow on you after a while.
26. My biology teacher decided to create vocal cords with stem cells. The results really speak for themselves.
27. One flower looks at the other and says, “You hungry?” The second flower responded, “I could use a light snack.”
28. Student: “A protein is something that is made up of mean old acids.”
29. Teacher: “What is the definition of a protein?”
Biology Jokes For Teachers
30. The DJ at the plant club is called a photosynthesizer.
31. The patient donated his organ to the doctor’s practice. It wouldn’t fit through the door.
32. The second flower responded, “I could use a light snack.”
33. The veterinarian was asked to scale back on her fish.
34. The white blood cells and antibodies kicked the disease out of the party. Disease: Well fine, you weren’t a very good host anyway.
35. There’s a rumor in the air about a new germ, but don’t spread it around.
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36. Today in biology class we were dissecting an eye. I kept thinking of jokes but they were getting cornea and cornea.
37. Two blood cells met and fell in love. Sadly, it was all in vein.
38. We just hired a new molecular biologist. Wow, isn’t she small?
39. What can you use to get plaque off of your brain? Neural Crest.
40. What did Cinderella say while reading a biology textbook? “I hate mitosis.”
41. What did Gregor Mendel say when he founded genetics? “Woopea!”
42. What did one cell say to his sister cell when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!
43. What did the avid recyclers name their triplets? Polly, Ethel, and Ian.
44. What did the cell say when he ran into the table? Mitosis!
45. What did the conservative biologist say? “The only cleavage I want to see is at the cellular level.”
46. What did the endoplasmic reticulum say to the Golgi? “I like your body,” it said. Golgi replied, “It’s complex.”
47. What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
48. What do biologists post on Instagram? Cell-fies.
49. What do football players wear on their heads? Helminth.
50. What do hipster biologists wear? Skinny genes.
Funny Biology Jokes For Science Students
51. What do other plants do when one of their plant friends is sad? Photosympathize.
52. What do you call a cab that provides drug therapy? Chemotaxis.
53. What do you call a scientist the studies the ghosts of pets? A boo-ologist.
54. What do you call an organic compound with an attitude? A-mean-o acid.
55. What do you call it when your Biology grade is close to an F? Biodegraded.
56. What do you call the leader of a biology gang? The nucleus.
57. What does a biologist tell you when you have to give blood? B positive!
58. What is a skeleton’s favorite dish? Ribs!
59. What is the fastest way to determine the sex of a chromosome? Pull down its genes!
60. What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
61. What’s the difference between a microbe and an in-law? None, they both get under your skin.
62. What’s the tiniest virus in the world? Smallpox.
63. Where did the viruses go? They flu away.
64. Where do hippos go to university? Hippocampus.
65. Which came first? The chicken or the egg? The chicken! He crossed the finish line and won first place. The egg kind of just rolled along.
66. Which place of worship is made from amino acids? The cysteine chapel.
67. Why are men sexier than women? You can’t spell sexy without xy.
68. Why aren’t students allowed in the biology teachers’ lounge? It’s for staph only.
69. Why can’t a plant be on the dark side of the Force? Because it can’t make food without the light!
70. Why did the bacteria cross the microscope? To get to the other slide.
71. Why did the biologist break up with the physicist? They had no chemistry.
72. Why did the biologist not water all of the plants? Because they couldn’t find the thyme!
73. Why did the blood cell lose service? He went through a tunnel.
74. Why did the scuba diver fail biology? He was below “C” level.
75. Why did the woman break up with the biologist? He was too cell-fish.
76. Why didn’t anyone want the biologist’s new book? It was a hard cell.
77. Why do biologists like to travel? It makes them more cultured.
78. Why do biologists look forward to casual Fridays? They’re allowed to wear genes to work.
79. Why was the amoeba sad? His parents just split.
80. Why was the biologist broke? Because he was sporely paid.
81. Why was the girl worried about biology class? She has a Nervous System.
82. Why was the mushroom so popular? He was a real fungi.
83. Why wouldn’t the scientist go into the haunted house? He was too petrified.
84. Y’all want to hear a potassium joke? K.
